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Looking Back, Moving Forward

After the divorce, I have found myself with time that I didn’t have before.  Weekends free here and there to explore, relax, feed my soul.

At the age I am, it is essential to me to connect with my past as I move into my new future.  Friends who have been there through some of my greatest times and through some of my worst nightmares.

Through the generosity of my sweet friends I have been able to travel and reconnect with these people who helped to mold me into the person I am today.  Bless them.  These connections ground me, and it feels so good to know they are still there when my life with a medically fragile daughter prevented me from connecting more, keeping in touch more, physically hugging them more.  I am blessed with friends who understand that life takes you on a crazy ride, but that they are not forgotten.  They reach out periodically when I should be the one reaching out.  But they know.  My life can be so full of the needs of this fragile human that I forget to take care of me, to acknowledge them.

Have a friend who is a caregiver? Reach out to them, even if it’s just a phone call, a text, a card.  They aren’t ignoring you, trust me. This life can be lonely on a level that some believe they may never have to experience.  But we all become caregivers at some point. You will see.

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While some folks talk about the internet as if it is an evil thing, it is a life-line for me. I connect with friends from the past and enjoy watching their journeys. I make new friends with similar interests.  I find joy in helping others in my situation make their journey easier.  I find peace in the pictures.  I get motivated from those silly memes.

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It is a life that makes it hard to give back, to pay it forward but I find ways to do this. Give precious blood. Send a text to another caregiver. Visit at the hospital as I know that those moments are so very hard on the soul. Get involved with FB groups. Get involved with political issues. So many have given to me, to us. While I am pinching pennies till they scream, I want to let you know I am here- I now have that precious commodity of time to reach out. Ok, reach out on the days I am “off”…but still.

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5 thoughts on “Looking Back, Moving Forward

  1. I enjoy reading your posts. I can relate to being out of touch. Now that my life has changed, You inspire me to reach out more to my special needs mom friends as they continue their struggle. My journey may have changed but I will let them know I am still there for them.

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